Somebody asked me to list 20 things that make me feel good..
when I think about them, talk about them or do them.
Just as a resource. And I began.
But what is 'feeling good' to me? What is the feeling of feeling good.
Perhaps, it has many colours.
Feeling good doesn't feel alone any one of the following:
Feeling good isn't just feeling happy or feeling pleasured.
feeling desired or inspired. feeling cared for, or satisfied.
not anymore.
feeling good isn't being in a good mood. in a state of excitement,
or thrill or emergency. a hint of feeling good still exists in surviving a mess.
or solving a puzzle i battled with. but just a hint.
feeling good isn't about success, popularity or even creativity anymore.
not in the dance performance or the applause after, not even the drawing.
feeling good is not a heightened state of being anymore.
feeling good is not about winning, conquering, progressing, or succeeding despite the hazards, risks, or hardships.
a good feeling not in successfully convincing anyone, selling or marketing myself either.
a good feeling isn't when people think i'm good at what i do, or judge me as good.
a GOOD FEELING is something more constant now. in the plain moments of the day.
when nobody is even there to notice it. or appreciate it. a good feeling is subtle and constant.
i associate a good feeling with nerve impulses firing themselves to be alive. just like when you get a chill down your back. a good feeling is alive, pulsating and so very personal that love even is distant. a good feeling is so natural and so uncalled for, yet constantly present as if it is the very nature of my being. this good feeling, when i understand it in language is just two words, alive and true. this good feeling is a combination of alive and honest, true. and everything can be true. love, emotions, happiness, cities, civilization, money, psychology, family, events, and everything can also be untrue. to itself.
notice your good feelings. is it in chocolate milkshake or lemonade or with lying in the sun with eyes closed, or in reading and gaining knowledge, in a task or in meditation.
what do you associate with feeling good. how does feeling good feel, taste and smell.
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as i re read this. i notice the lines..
ReplyDeleteeven love is distant.
here i feel, the love implied is love of a lover, love with fiction, love in literature and cinema.
not the love of sufi poetry.
not the love of oneself and god within.
that love is oneness. there is no distance in oneness.
Synchronicity:
ReplyDeleteVirgo Horoscopes
(Aug 23 - Sep 22)
Yesterday | Today | Tomorrow
Thursday, Nov 18th, 2010 -- You may be your own worst enemy today, especially if you believe that you are channeling the ultimate truth. Normally, you can be quite logical, but now your fantasies are mixed up with your thoughts, tempting you to leave your common sense behind. Don't assume that your perspective is better than everyone else's; there may be other options that you haven't yet considered.
chamki: dear horoscopes from a website.
There is no question of another person in seeking ultimate truth. there are no perspectives in oneness. there is no one to be better off than. In my feeling, of feeling good, I'm good and may be what you can call confident, but there is no need even to be better.
better is a strange comparison that i dont require.
i take your words no more. the ultimate truth i will see with eyes shut. thank you very much.