what to do

As Bombay grows nearer my mind scatters more. I go home to my parents, friends, a life I've known and names I remember with fondness. Its dramatic big city life or the illusion of it. The sea breeze. Several fingers tugging at me are pulling in different directions, a sister who planted the seed of goa in my mind, a known stranger who would like to see me in bangalore, Krushnaa, who wants to me to visit her and accompany her to Trivandrum (I would like to), Kirsten, who says Nepal is the place for the owner of a lonely heart like mine, and me, who would like to stay close to my parents, with everyone around me, my sister, my family, friends, and yes known strangers too. But life's not like that.
I want to go to a place like Gokarna, or to my idea of it. Scorching beaches and bodies roasting lazily in the sun only to take a dip once in a while. I want to sit around in Bombay, at the beach, walking around in Bandra and visiting my private church. Really doing nothing much, more soaking in. I want to return smelling of the sea breeze.But the whole universe seems to be working against it.